That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
