i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
