Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
This is not my ceiling
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
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