she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
