Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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