a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
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