Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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