Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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