Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
