I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
