Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
