Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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