you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
