how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Randomize
