Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
