That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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