So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
