It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
no more duck duck goose at the bar
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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