pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
