Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
