my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize