fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
