there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
