Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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