Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
