i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
