Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
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