But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
