I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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