Having a random hookup so left but love u
Actions speak louder than pants.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
