i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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