I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
