sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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