Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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