3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
