You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Randomize
