no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
