i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
