So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
