I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
