Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Pappa wants mamma naked
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
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