Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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