thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
