You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
