I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
