Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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