she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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