Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
