I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Randomize
