that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
