I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
